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When Things Fall Apart: Heart Advice for Difficult Times

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When Things Fall Apart: Heart Advice for Difficult Times

By Pema Chödrön

Audio available 13 minute read Published Jun 7, 2016

What you'll learn

If certainty exists, few of us actually know it. For most of us, our lives are permeated with ambiguity and a host of emotions that tether us to a mentality of despair. Buddhist teachings encourage people to overcome this pessimistic mindset by diving straight into its core: In order to surpass sensations of fear, worry, and anger, you must drive into the center of their being. To transcend uncertainty, you must relinquish control. Contentment requires growing comfortable with the unknown; this kind of comfort derives from allowing yourself simply to be, allowing emotions to stretch on so that they peacefully dissipate. Buddhist nun and teacher Pema Chödrön delivers timely advice for withstanding the world’s inherent uncertainty through practicing maitri, or loving-kindness towards oneself, to transform negative emotions into positive realities—pain falls into peace.

Key insights

  1. 1 Fear is a threshold, a doorway to a room of understanding and acceptance.
  2. 2 When things crumble, don’t run to reconstruct—that traps you in a samsara, a circle of endless desire and frustration.
  3. 3 Stop labeling your thoughts good or bad; call them “thinking” instead.
  4. 4 Cultivate compassion with an inner seed: kindness to yourself.
  5. 5 An aggressive truth is an ineffective truth.
  6. 6 Future joy is a product of present awareness.

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